Still here, just doing our thing.

What's going on with us?
Well I dragged myself out of bed, inches away from sleep, and am sitting in front of an obnoxiously bright monitor to tell you.  Partly because it's been a while and if I don't write now it will go on being a while, mostly because my mom brought to my attention today that my lack of presence on social media looks like aloofness, and am I terminally ill and just not telling people, or what?
Nope. We're all healthy, and the fact that not even one of us has a cold is nothing short of a miracle.
We're hale, hearty, and reasonably happy*.
But we are cranking out days over here, and sometimes I plum forget there's anything else.
Because it goes like this:
The sun is up, there's sounds down the hall, greet the kids, Oliver is jumping in his crib with big eyes and Woggy smiles, Greta is talking about "finishing her dream" so won't you please pull the shade back down, it's getting the kids out of sticky wet things into clean dry things, 3 scrambled eggs, 4 pieces of toast, and 1,000 blueberries, listening to records, free play, Oliver climbs on things, I take him off of things, giant bottle of milk, he naps, quiet lunch with Greta "Shhh we're whispering!", sesame street, Greta swinging on the swing on her tummy, if it's hot it's a pool day, if it's not it's a craft day, Oliver has a finely diced banana at 2:00, errands or any excuse to be out where there is more coffee, Kent comes home, there's a change in command, dinner, gym, dishes, kids go to bed, and then Kent and I stare at each other and consider the silence, what does this mean? And what should we do with this time? This fragile gift? And what we do is really no ones business, but almost always there's more food. And eventually sleep, the sun is up, there's sounds down the hall...

It's so easy at times to get lost in this cycle.  Like all there is in the world is our little family and the activities that go on in the tiny little framework we've made. The rest of the world could burn to the ground but I'm not sure I'd notice, we're cranking out days here, scrambling eggs, raising kids here.
And for the most part, I like what I see, so I don't always hurry to read the news, or peek my face out too far from the fence.
Some days, weeks...lately.

* Unless you count Greta's new infatuation with being sad on purpose. No Joke, Oliver picked up a ceramic votive holder thingy out of the cupboard and broke it on the tile floor, Greta's instantaneous reaction was to muster up some tears and cry "Oh noooo! I am really really really going to miss that...." And then she stops because she realizes that she had never seen that thing before, and doesn't even know what to call it. But don't worry, she will pine and lose sleep over it as if it was her only treasure.

Happy Independence Day!

As much as I throw myself into reading about other countries and cultures, and looking forward to far away trips to here and there. It's always with the understanding that to me, home is best.
I am happy to explain to Greta why we celebrate today, and how in so many ways, we are free, and because of that we are blessed!
One of my favorite children's books is Caldecott winner "So you want to be President" by Judith St. George, illustrated by Davis Small. Have you read it? If not, you really should visit the link and scroll through some of it. (Just click on the amazon image)
The illustrations and narration are lighthearted, and filled with facts and funny anecdotes about our nation's presidents.  It's a must read for the kids on a day like today!
Happy 4th of July!

Also, for fact loving grownups,  this article is interesting...

Can't....campaigning.

My online presence has been light these days, as I've only just returned from Russia last night. I've been campaigning* again, and this time it's been in Russia, 1812. 
I finished War and Peace, which was a goal I set for myself to do before my next birthday. And I reached it well under time, due to it being just an awesome and surprisingly easy read. Seriously, no slogging whatsoever. Does that surprise anyone else?
(I put off reading W&P  for a long time because A) I thought it was for super duper intellectuals and B) I was slightly embarrassed to pick it up, because it sounded like such a cliche-trying to look smart- kind of activity. "You know, sorry I can't go out tonight, I'm reading War and Peace" - gag.)
But I was surprised and excited to find how accessible and engaging it was! And Russia! How did I not know how cool you are? It's all my fault, I rarely leave England.
So, I guess this is just a quick news update to say: War and Peace-awesome and attainable, sorry I haven't posted pictures of the kids, they're still cute, I'm still here....but not really. I'm heading back to East this evening. I haven't read Anna Karenina** and since I'm familiar with the neighborhood...

*When I am absorbed in a book, Kent and I refer to it as my campaign. Since it usually means forsaking all else to read at all hours, and then also supplementing the experience with additional research relevant to the time/place/topic/author. You know, maps, image searches, wikipedia articles, snippets of other books pertaining to the subject. In order to really enrich my reading, and make it come alive.
And bonus! Besides understanding your book better, in the process you acquire useful snippets like how to identify between a Hussar and a Cossack on the field of battle. Ps- Hussars are more my style- cuties.

**Usually a campaign is not over when the book ends.  I don't want to waste all that good research when it's fresh in my mind, by switching gears too quickly, so I like to stick around in that era or type of fiction for a while and let the experiences from that book lend its flavors to the next, forming a sort of immersive lit stew.

 ...am I the only one who does this?

Tough gig.

Oh my gosh, what a week.
Which came so inconveniently after last week which was exhausting, which was unfortunately placed right after the week before that, which was a total bear.
I'm starting the get the suspicion that this marathon called motherhood has no real finish line, and my emotions are going to be all tired and wobbly until my children bury me.
There there, it's not all that bad really, I promise. 
I just have the teensiest case of post traumatic stress after this morning with the littles.
Which was beautifully capped off with a scream I did not think I was capable of, as Oliver teetered on the brink of the top steps, while I was fiddling with his sleep sack in his room.
It was a wonderfully wild "NOOOOOOO". The kind that I always thought you had to be an actress to perform. But there it was, and like all things in motherhood, I rose to the occasion.
Oliver is resting now, and Greta is absorbed in Sesame Street, both blissfully forgetting the turmoils of our morning as I attempt to do the same.
And I think this article helped a little.
Most posts and articles relating to motherhood I read (and love!) are ones that are continually raising the bar for the rest of us. That kids party! Those braids! That delicious healthy snack! And it's easy to think, subtly, I guess this is what motherhood really looks like...I better get my act together.
But today I was refreshed by a little honesty instead.
An excerpt...

"How the external circumstances of new parenthood will affect your mood might be easier to predict. If you are good at just being in the moment and taking your life as it comes, there can be a Zen-like quality to your days with baby. But say you're someone like me—someone who likes the feeling of planning out your day, both what you're going to accomplish and when and how you're going to relax, and then executing that plan--then you will probably find that the long, aimless weeks of waiting on and reacting to your newborn are unsatisfying, frustrating, even depressing. You may find yourself a little weepy at the end of a cold, gray day in which you accomplished nothing but half a load of laundry, now moldering in the washer since the baby's surprisingly early awakening from her morning nap. You may find yourself unreasonably irritable when your partner calls to say that he or she is going to be home from work thirty minutes late.
I was less weepy on the days when I got more done, when I felt more competent. I draw a lot of satisfaction from the experience of mastering a task, of figuring it out and doing it well, but the task of parenting a new baby changes so rapidly that it's nearly impossible to feel any sense of mastery in those first few months." 

And while I don't dare compare my exploits with a 4 and 1 year old to those first few months with a new baby- which is more gruelling to the mind and body than anything else I can think of.
I relate, as so many days feel like I'm just reacting to situations instead of mastering them.

But the reason I feel like I can share any of this with you is because, I honestly honestly honestly can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing.
I know because one especially tired and dark evening I thought of all of my favorite things to do, and dream accomplishments and imagined what if I was doing that instead?
But it was no real comparison.
Truth is I like my job, even if it does chew you up and spit you out.


Ps- This picture, let's not get the idea that cutie pie Wog with sauce all over his face is what's meant by a tough gig. I just don't have a proper visual to match today's content. Who would take such pictures?

Happy Father's Day

This is my dad. He's awesome. (He's a boss, but that mustache is a sticker.)
He is one of the family....let me explain.
Family can get all kinds of messy when your parents are divorced. It's sad in a variety of ongoing ways. But there can be a lot of beauty in those hard places.
I've always held Ecclesiastes 3:11 close to my heart.
"He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end." 
 Maybe  Probably I'm taking that verse right out of context. But I've always found comfort in the knowledge of God taking hard things, ugly things, all things, and making them beautiful in His time.
Some things won't have their beauty until heaven, but there is a lot that can be found here and now.
Like, I know my dad. I know him so much better than I did when my parents were together. I don't get to take him for granted by lumping him into the broad title "Mom-and-Dad". It's Mom, and Dad now.
They are more their own people in my mind. Different, separate, each with their own personalities and gifts to bring to the table.
And our relationship has grown because of this, I think, but also we get to see him so much more!
Being a retired bachelor means he can come and share life with us any time, and he does, and we love it. He's a huge part of our life.
He's one of us at our house. He knows the kids quirks, and how to put Oliver down with a bottle. He helps with errands, reads bedtime stories, knows where everything is, and the study/guestroom is mainly referred to as "Grandpa's room". Being around him at home is as casual and normal as being around Kent.
When he goes home (his real home) we miss him, the kids ask about him, and there's a little whisper of a feeling that our family just got smaller.
Because, see he's truly one of the family.

Love you Dad! Happy Father's Day!

Leslie's Baby Shower

Today I threw a baby shower for lovely Leslie and little baby Scarlett.
It was sunshiney, happy, and fun. And we are so excited to meet our newest little friend.
Xoxo Leslie!

A birthday and a bit of advice...

Today is my Love's birthday!
And this guy is no joke -amazing- so it's time to celebrate.
One of my absolute favorite things in the whole world to tell Greta is: "Look at your daddy, do you see this guy right here? This is what a man looks like."
And my heart bursts with loving pride that I get to tell her that.
So Greta this is for you, pay attention, you will probably have to pick out a fella someday. Please consider choosing someone who:

-Wakes up early while the house is still sleeping, and is the first person in his office in the morning. Not because he's a morning person, but because he's a person who wants to spend as much time with you as possible. And will do whatever it takes to make it home from work earlier.

-Goes halfsies on the kid and house duties.  Because A) He loves to serve, and  B) He knows that it isn't 1954 and he's just as capable as you are. 

-Is curious and loves to learn! Because he will probably share all his fun finds with you, and growing together intellectually is a sure way to stay young together.

- Makes you laugh, because people/cats/language/life is ridiculous, it's best just to laugh.

-Loves Jesus genuinely. Because he's not going to be perfect, and you will both need Him to know how to love and forgive one another. 

-Loves being a dad. Because if you decide to have children it makes all the difference that he loves it. And it makes being a mom an absolute joy.

-Cranks up the stereo uncomfortably loud, sings too high for his God given abilities, and dances fist to the ceiling and hips all up in everyone's business. Because a man this awesome needs an outlet.

Happy Birthday Dear Love!